toxic

Your Petty Isn't Pretty, Sis.

Your Petty Isn't Pretty, Sis.

She came to me broken. 
She'd been making the same excuse for years and it had finally caught up with her.  "This is just who I am" was no longer working in her life.  Her boss had called her into the office with a write-up about her

Toxic Is As Toxic Does

Okay, I'll admit it - I used to go OFF on people.
Come on, don't act like you've never had a moment where you wanted to be the better person, but, you reacted to a situation in a negative manner.   I can remember being pushed to the limit and reacting in a less than favorable manner to the person who pushed my button.  At the time, I didn't know that I had control over the buttons that people were pushing.  I just figured that if someone said or did something that caused me to feel disrespected, I had to defend myself. 

Someone is reading this and saying to themselves, "I've never done that!"
If you've never been in such a situation, just keep going to sleep and waking up.  I guarantee that you will have moments in your life where you will say or do something you regret.  The good news, is that you will do better as you learn.  The bad news, is that there are so many hurting people in the World, you are bound to run into a few.  One thing I have learned over the last several years of working with others and myself, is that I am in control of my buttons.  Hurting people feed off of the negative reactions they get while spewing negativity, and your best line of defense is to not react, at all.  Did you know that no reaction is indeed a reaction? 

We always want to have the last word, don't we?
What makes us get to a point where we know someone is hurting, so we want to hurt them back?  I have a friend who told me once, "If you knew someone was mentally ill, you would treat them like they were mentally ill."  This is so true.  We don't always know why people lash out, but we do know that there is a level of being toxic that exudes out of the pores of people.  We pretend we don't feel this energy when push come to shove, and this person says something we do not like.  We want to say what's on our mind, and get it off of our chest like the other person. 

God wants us to be quiet sometimes. 
There's always a reason to practice taming your tongue.  There's always a reason to pray for someone who is bringing you toxic energy.  I have lost friends and personal relationships from being toxic.  It wasn't until I was on the other side of the table that I got a chance to see what a toxic Dawn looked like.  Words are truly a powerful thing. They give us the power to heal and the power to hurt, and the power to build up and the power to tear down.

Controlling what we say from moment to moment is perhaps the most daunting challenge of Christian living.
This is the one challenge people who want to live a fruitful life. but who also want to resolve issues.  I do not like confrontation, and at the same time, I don't like to leave situations that I want to work on, stagnant.  It can sometimes put you in a tough predicament, but it's a great challenge to overcome.  You avoid the angry outbursts, cutting remarks, and unguarded responses that lead only to damage, embarrassment, and regret.

And what kind of new habits of speech should replace the old?
Words of encouragement, words that bring life to others and to self, words that do not cause dis-ease in others.    If the last words you feel the need to utter are not bringing life to someone, do all parties involved a favor - don't speak.  As fast as you can praise God, is as fast as you can lead someone away from God, just by not taming your tongue.  Think about it.