You don't always have to win

Be thankful for the lessons in the losses.

Oh yes, they certainly DO exist.

"I've been married 3-4 times"

"I helped him/her, and they left me when they made it"

"That was supposed to be my job"

No matter how it all plays out, some losses are the biggest blessings around.

Some people won't know what to say when you cry and moan about your losses.

Some people will distance themselves because they don't want to be involved in your losses.

If you're not careful, you won't give yourself enough credit for the way you persevered through the losses.

When I think of all my wins, I can truly say that the best wins came after a number of losses.

And trust me, I've lost a lot in order to gain.  There were a lot of people, places, and things that I had an attachment to, and those things hurt to let go of.

I learned a lot from detaching from people, places, and things.

I learned that I was addicted to winning in front of others.  I knew this because I wanted people to see me win, but, not see me lose.

But, I lost, and, it was painful.  Tears were involved.  So were mixed emotions, uncertainty, and fear.

So was surrender.

That surrender came with a breakthrough.

Be thankful for the wins, and be grateful for the losses.

Ase

XOXO

Healing yourself to heal others

You are so strong in front of everyone.

You help so many people.

Why is it, then, that when you're alone, you keep crying out to God because of the pain you choose not to address?

Babe, you can't heal anyone until you make the choice to heal yourself.

You're not doing a good job faking it, and you aren't doing a good job making me believe it.

All of the wonderful advice I hear you giving people, but you've not given that same advice to yourself.

Why are you in so much pain?

Let's go ahead and take it back to the basics.

YOU must STOP helping others if you aren't willing to help yourself, FIRST.

Ase

Let them come and go

Whoever "they" are, let them roam freely, without your words of contempt.

Just as you are making changes to your life in order to best suit you, "they" are doing the same.

It's okay.  Allow the reason and season to be as it is.

Let them come and go.

Let them find the best for them. 

Are "they" emotions?

Do "they" consume you, and make you feel like you're less than others?

Let those emotions come and go.

Are you doing your best each day?

Are you allowing emotions, and others, to come and go?

Free yourself from the need to hold on.

There are never enough reasons that someone can give you when they are ready to leave.

There are never enough answers you can give another when you are ready to leave.

You can learn how to manage your emotions, and pick the ones best suited for you.

What are you holding onto?

Until tomorrow.

XOXO

Noble Silence

Do not be afraid of the voices.

They are guiding you through the noise coming from here and coming from there.

Do not be afraid to sit still and wait.

Waiting is the ultimate sacrifice for if you believe that you are here for a purpose but are unsure how to get there, silence will give you the answers.

We are used to getting the answers from others.

If we have a problem, we reach out to get the comfort of words from someone who rarely gives us the answers we already have within.

They give us words to fill the empty space we won't allow the answers silence brings to fill it up.

Please be quiet.

Allow silence to answer your questions.

Learn to calm your mind so that you can re-learn how to hear your own thoughts.

Meditation isn't a scary thing.

It's you spending time with you, encompassed by The Creator who has always been there to give you the answer.

If only we could block out the outside noise so that we could really hear what we need to hear.

There is such a sweetness about being silent.

XOXO

Be Authentically You

I'm an extroverted introvert.  I no longer apologize for it.

Prior to my admission, I lost friends all the time.   They thought I was a flake. 

I was just socially awkward.

I can feel the energies of others, and, some energies depleted me.

Servant Leadership requires a lot of time, patience, and energy.

When I'm alone, I like quiet time and noise is a hindrance to my energy. 

How do you explain that to people?

I didn't know how, so, I just allowed people to go without complaint.

Now, my friends love and support my space, and I'm more comfortable in small social settings.

You would think that someone who helps so many people wouldn't have a problem with interpersonal communication.

This is the life of a healer.  I am being authentically me.

There is always someone to impress.  We put our best foot forward, but sometimes, that best foot is not a representation of who we are.

We put on an act. 

We put on the better face.

But, what happens when we forget to put on the act?

What happens when you're not quite sure who you are, and people start to notice?

Do you know who you are?  I mean, after all, you are one person in front of some people, and perhaps someone different in front of others.  Are we wanting to fit in so we assimilate, or, are we acting? 

Only you know the answer.
 

XOXO

Self versus Ego

We battle between self and ego daily.

Self knows that your energy needs to be cleared of anything negative.

Ego, well, ego wants to please everyone else.

Ego doesn't want enemies

We are so used to EGO.

We are so used to pleasing others before we please ourselves.

Reintroduce yourself to SELF.

Self loves SELF, first.

Self loves to practice SELF preservation.

Self is true to self.

XOXO

Be Open to Letting Go

We have a hard time letting go of people, even when we know that their existence in our everyday lives has become a hindrance. 
Then, we make excuses for the reason we keep them around, you know, so that we can endure more abuse.

"I've known him/her so long."

"That's just who she is."

"I'm used to that behavior from him."

The very things we are wanting to hold on to, are the very things we may one day need to sacrifice.

We are seeking validation from others, and see a departure as being violated.  Can we agree to make sure that above all, we honor ourselves, first.  You are wanting to know that you are a good person, and you are basing that on how others perceive your treatment of them.  Some partnerships come to an end, and, it's okay.  It's really okay.  No one has to be wrong in order for you to be right.  Allow people to be true to themselves, and be true to you.

Let people go, and, allow others to release you. 

There's no need to feel hurt when people decide to no longer associate with you.  Whatever the reason, it's never personal, and you must decide that above all - you did your best during that reason and you were very instrumental in that season.

"When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering" Don Miguel Ruiz
Let's stop taking other people and their issues personal.  Someone may even need to take that advice when dealing with you.  It's okay.

Be open to loving people from afar.
When you can't change the people around you, then you will need to change the people around you.  Live and learn through the lessons, and spend less time in disappointment.  Require no one to change so that you can be more comfortable around them, and know that sometimes what was once comfortable may not be comfortable anymore.

The more you let go of, the more room you open up in your space mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually.  Let go of the old, and cherish the good parts of the experience.

You will be a better person because of it.

Letting go is healthy.

As you release, you gain.

XOXO

Needless Fear

When you are a Leader, you leave a legacy. 

You don't have to meet each and every person that you touch, and, it doesn't matter because you're not doing it for public validation. 

You are true to SELF.

You are a Leader.

You SERVE those in need and, when you touch a heart, you thank God for the gift.

Maya was a leader, speaking on lesbianism, porn, and rape , amongst other things,  WAY before her time.

I INDEED know why The Caged Bird Sings.

It takes courage to be a leader, and to make it your lifestyle.

It takes NEED-less fear.

Thankfully, as I entered dramatic interpretation competitions for the first time in high school, my ending piece was, "Phenomenal Woman".  I had no background training, yet, I could recite her poem flawlessly in front of anyone. I won first place, each time. That poem got me into a 4-year University.

I was fearless for those few moments, each time I performed that piece - a time in my life I will never forget.

That's what Maya gave me.

What are you giving the World around you?

Silence is Golden

So much trouble in the World, that sometimes it's hard to be silent.  I have wanted to speak on several occasions, but been silenced by The Creator. 

We must learn when we are speaking from EGO, and when we are speaking from The Creator.

Sometimes, there's power in silence.

All of your thoughts don't have to be verbalized for them to still be your thoughts.  There is power in refrain. 

There is power in pausing - Selah.

Not everything is meant for you to speak upon.

Digest this today.

XOXO

Your Ener

"People can feel you coming before they can see you coming." My Life Coach Justin
Your energy is always present, and though we can't see it, we can feel it.  What are you giving to others?  It's so important to ask yourself that question because what you give to others, you are also receiving.  When I was younger, I was viewed as a pretty girl with issues. (I know this now because friends from my past have let me know this)

People told me they could feel my negative energy before I would even open my mouth.   It weighed me down like a weight jacket, and I refused to see it.  I blamed each of these issues on my past, sure that these were the reasons that I was so unhappy.  I was the reason.

In the midst of all your living, make sure you aren't living in, and recreating, your past fails and disappointments.

Are you creating new memories with old energies?  
Are you spending so much time reminiscing on the negative things that you're not living in the present and seeing all of the good currently around you?

Are you starting old habits with new people?
Are you reliving an old situation with a new person, reflecting on what went wrong with someone else and using it as your litmus for your current situation?

Did you know that life was meant to be happy, fulfilling, and full of peace?
It's true.  If you are still holding on to past negativity, please, let it go.  Your energy can become stale if the negativity isn't released.