Storytime # 1 - That One Time He Wanted To Kill His Wife!

Well, you know my transparency will either make you laugh, or, make you cry laughing.  Today's story is no different.  One day, I met this guy at the Sherman Oaks 24 Hour Fitness, and, well... Watch for yourself!

Lay down your fear / pick up your faith

I have been enjoying this much needed vacation from social media.   I've had a lot of time to read, write, and I am excited and at the same time in awe of God's presence in my life.   In the midst of this change, God sent me a friend that most people would die to have; a compassionate, affectionate, and honest person who loves me unconditionally despite my flaws and continues to amaze me on a daily basis.

I have battled storms as many of you have over the last few months, and one of the things that I always do is teach you while I am being taught. This blog goes out to my friend who has / continues to teach me what it's like to be Christ-like.

The pain and frustration of learning that which God yearns to teach us can sometimes be overbearing, but to survive life you must be a warrior and adopt a stronger demeanor than the average person.

• What are YOU going through that you CAN'T talk to anyone about?
• What dreams have YOU ALLOWED to become DEFERRED in place of fear, doubt, and worry?
• What is YOUR MOTIVATION?

Below are 3 Things You Must Know About God and Your Breakthrough...

ADVERSITY IS GOD'S WAY OF GIVING YOU GUIDANCE AND INSTRUCTION. 
I remember when I was losing weight and I really wanted to push myself to the limit. I had never been bungee jumping before but had always wanted to go. I consider myself to be daring, and the idea that I would be jumping off a bridge was too tempting to refuse. The hike was the most challenging part of the whole trip. Though I had been hiking in the Santa Monica Mountains for weeks, I was not prepared to depend on my balancing act on a fallen tree and a rope to get me across the swift current that had me afraid of being carried away. I can recall zoning out and all of my thoughts went to crossing safely while still having fun. All of a sudden, I became "G.I. Self-Esteem Queen"and crossed right on over with no problem! I WAS BEYOND EXCITED! God showed me that once I took the fear off crossing and put my thoughts on the fun I was having, it became a joyous experience for me.

DELAY IS NOT DENIAL.
I have learned that what God does for others He more than desires to do for you. When I'm longing for Him to be closer to me, He's longing for me to be closer to Him. That feels so good! I stood there on the podium afraid that since I was close to the last person jumping that the cords somehow had gotten tired and would definitely give out on me - THE WRONG THOUGHTS TO BE HAVING BEFORE JUMPING OFF A BRIDGE! I stood there and thought about all the choices I made and how they affected my life. I thought about how God always came through in the nick of time when I would have to smile in public and cry in private at things I went through in my personal life. Delay is not denial when the goal is to learn by example even if the example is you learning from yourself. I looked down, smiled at God for allowing me to see just how much fun everyone before me had, and I jumped the heck off that bridge!

FAITH REQUIRES YOU TO TRUST BEYOND THAT WHICH YOU CAN UNDERSTAND. 
Sometimes when you're in the midst of your trials you want to give up and throw in the towel. It's difficult to deal with broken hearts, unpaid bills, uncertainty about job security, and surviving in a city where innocent people are gunned down at random. At my lowest point, I was reminded of the following from a dear friend; I have been here in this exact place before at some point in my life, so this place is not foreign to me (and should not be foreign to you either). This is the time to put on the armor my friends. The enemy we call bitterness, rage, guilt, frustration, setbacks, hold-ups, and things of that nature are outside waiting for you to come from your retreat. You, therefore, MUST remember what Ephesians 6:11-13 says,

Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the
devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against
the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and
against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on
the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to
stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.

Today is the day to return to that hobby, activity, or goal setting that had you fired up for life long ago. I'm not afraid of failing, I'm afraid of not trying my hardest to achieve my goals. I am always inspired by those who I see around me reach their goals and beyond. I stand before you encouraged for your future, and humbly accept my lessons so that my future can be bright and full of wisdom.

I love you, and there's absolutely, positively, nothin' you can do about it!!!

SEQ

Who are you really "doing the work" for?

Matthew 6:1 (NIV)

This scripture was heavy on my mind this morning during meditation. 

I was having a conversation with someone yesterday about this very thing.  I see so many people who get online and post pictures of every single thing they do to help others.  In my line of business, that's just not possible to do.    Healing work isn't for show, and it isn't for testimonials to gain more clients.  You see, when you're helping someone through molestation, abandonment issues, or getting over being gang-raped, you just don't broadcast these healing moments online for people to praise you.

Well, I don't, but I'm always bothered by people who do.

When I gave my life to Christ, I made a decision to follow in His direction the best I could.  There are some things I don't mind talking about, like an overall event or an organization or community I spoke for that touched me, but some conversations and emails are just not for public consumption. 

Others are doing the work, then, jumping online and posting pictures of themselves "recovering" after "the work".  As a healer, that also is something I don't do.  I don't talk about the seizures I have (unless it's after the fact), the battles I fight on behalf of myself and others, the pain I take on in order to heal someone else by giving them my positive energy in exchange for the opposite...

Who are you really doing the work for? 

Why are you helping others? 

Is it to brag and boast in front of others, or, are you telling a story to the people who care to "follow" you?  Are you subconsciously looking for validation from man?  Are you looking for praise from man?  I've noticed some things, and those things led me to shut down my social media accounts.  I don't want to see it, because I know people have their own reasons for doing things like this & I don't want to judge the actions.  It still disturbs me, so I choose not to look at it.

Specifically, I'm speaking of people who are "healers".    If you have to exploit someone's private and personal life to get praise, a new client, or validation, or if you have to exploit yourself in order to get people to pray for you, I want you to stop and look at the acts, and consider holding in all the things you experience on a daily if it has to include those you heal.

After you think about it, you'll thank me later.

Desensitized From Reality

Social media can be a gift, when you associate with like-minded people.

While we don't know the reason some people get online,  we hope that the people we befriend are like-minded. 

I've discovered that my fellow humans are jaded at the truth.  I've discovered that a lot of people would rather talk about mundane, non-important issues, because it's comfortable. 

Not everyone is looking to, "Be The Change."  Not everyone has empathy for your cause, and today, I need you to know that your audience may not be online.

Sometimes, I see that my fellow cultural creatives , and they are tired, and weary.   I see my fellow comrades unhappy that no one is willing to stand up for their cause as they are. 

HEAR ME WELL: Stop getting mad at people for being who they are.  We are not all the same.  Some people would rather talk about light issues online instead of issues of poverty, slavery, and corruption.  To get mad at someone for not being on the same level as you, or being upset because you want to be supported and the people who follow you don't support you, is, in my opinion, very petty.

Nobody has to support you. 
Nobody has to pat you on the back. 
Nobody has to stand up and fight the cause that keeps you up at night.

While I would be the first to support another person, I understand that others are not like me, and, it's okay.  You would do yourself, and those around you, a favor by lowering your expectations of others' actions.

So, you would say, "Why are you so negative about this?" 
I would answer, "I allow people to be who they are and, when I cannot change the people around me, I simply CHANGE the people around me.  This is the reason I eliminate people from my circle every single quarter."  It's not personal when I eliminate people, and, I don't take it personal when people no longer find me an asset in their lives. 

LAST WORDS: The moment you begin to "vent" online about your lack of support, don't be surprised when people are turned off, and stop supporting you altogether. 

This message was written with love.

XOXO

Stop venting to everyone

I need to let you know, that in the moment of pain, it's easy to vent to others because it feels good to get the pain off of your chest.  I need you to know, however, that once you let someone else in on your pain, you must then work to protect your feelings should that person one day get upset with you, and vent all about your venting.

It seems easy enough to pray to The Creator, but why then, are there an abundance of people who choose to vent to another human?

Each time I've vented to someone, I've almost immediately regretted it.   Spreading your pain to others only transfers the pain to more people, and it also transfers your business.  Can we take a moment to be very careful who we vent to?

Some of you are venting to a friend, about a mutual friend, then you're upset when the person you vented to runs back and vents your venting.

Some of you are venting on the job, about a boss, and then you're upset when you're workplace gets even more uncomfortable because someone vented your vent.

Some of you are venting about your spouse, then, you're upset when someone else swoops in to "save" him/her because your venting comes off as your not wanting to make the relationship work.

Babe, not everyone has your best interest at heart.  Some people are only patting your back to find a nice spot to place the knife they plan on sticking you with.

Spritual Warfare is Real

Do not be afraid, as you are being attacked, for this and that.
Spiritual warfare is real, and it's about time we had a discussion about what it really looks like.  Perhaps then, you will stop hurting people who are merely conduits, used by the enemy to attack you.

When you go to church, does the minister, preacher, pastor, elder, or bishop really talk to you about the warfare?  Does he/she tell you that the attacks will come

• in the form of battles
• people trying to test your boundaries
• fake friends who talk about you behind your back but smile in your face
• family members who will pray for your downfall
• early and unexpected deaths
• liars who steal from your, lie on your, and swear on a pack of bibles they are "real

As an ordained minister, I continue to face these attacks, and there have been moments when I allowed it to take a toll on my temple.  The impact of taking on the pain of others is hard, but then, to face attacks in the midst of helping people is a feeling only one who experiences it can understand.  As a servant leader, I must be the example for others.  There are moments when, I'm less than a leader.  Some moments, I cower over and cry like a baby.  I am drained in these moments at how jaded people are, at how unaware people are of their energies and how those energies affect others.

Out of the realm of suffering comes your biggest prize - realism. 

My constant request of The Creator is clarity and discernment.  When I find that someone is being used to attack me, and they are unaware, I step away, acknowledge the attack, and forgive the person being used to attack me.  Are you forgiving your attacker, or, are you taking the attacks personal?

How many 'Job' moments have you experienced where you cursed The Creator for the pain you inflict?  How many times have you asked for growth, then, got angry when that growth included being ostracized, misunderstood, prejudged, talked about, lied on, stolen from, beat up, spit on, yelled at, cursed out, and abandoned?

You cannot control who the enemy will use to attack you, yet, you get angry when someone attacks you.  Please think about it this way -  energies travel from person to person.  If you are in alignment, you can feel the energy of another without saying a word.  If we understand that the enemy comes to kill, steal, and destroy families, friends, love, joy, happiness, and tranquility, then we understand that the person DOING it to us is only being USED by the enemy, and therefore, we should not be angry at them for being too weak to resist the enemy.  Perhaps, for them, they are being used in a moment of weakness.  Perhaps, they are unaware they are even serving a purpose on this Earth.

BUT you know, and so you, you are responsible for the forgiveness, you are responsible for the energy YOU bring, and YOU, and you alone, are responsible for how you react to spiritual warfare.

When you are in the midst of your bliss, celebrating life and The Creator, know that the enemy is watching, and plotting on your happiness.  Babe, count that ALL joy - the enemy only conducts war on those who are serving The Creator.

Until tomorrow,

XOXO
 

When it Hurts so Bad

You want everyone to understand you, and your feelings are valid.

I must tell you though; there will be someone who won't understand you, so they will bash you, instead.

I am a very sensitive person.  Words hurt me, and I'm the first to be open with this part of my reality.  It's no surprise then, that when a season ends, I find myself feeling bad for all the goodbyes I must say in order to be me.

When it hurts so bad... When it hurts so bad... Why does it feel so good? (Lauryn Hill)

Stop entering painful situations when you know the pain will come...even if it's "eventually".

Please allow yourself some time to heal.  YOUR life depends on this.

Death is imminent in the heart of a person who continues to love on dead things, whatever those dead things may be.

• Dead marriage
• Dead friendship
• Dead relationship
• Dead partnership
• Dead-end job
• Dead-end time investment

I was told once, "If you're not growing, you're dying?"

When it hurts so bad...

When it hurts so bad, you feel the need to retaliate, you feel the need to "get back at 'em" BUT babe, you're only beating up yourself, and your self growth.

You've been listening to way too many lyrics that have lied to you.  Pain isn't love, and when it hurts so bad, you're supposed to LET IT GO.

XOXO

Only the strong survive

There's one thing that my friends and I always say to each other; "We don't break."

We endure all,
We overcome all,
We may cry,
We may be sad,
But,

WE
DON'T
BREAK.

But I see so many broken people, unable to cope with life's trials, unable to deal with the stresses of life... 

Sometimes, I feel like I'm bent all the way out of shape. 

Sometimes, I am overwhelmed at the energy I have to give out in order to help others get well.

Only the strong survive.

You need a strong mind.  Not the kind that can be swayed.  Not the kind that can be finessed by a slithering tongue.  Not the kind that, when depression strikes, allows you to sink deep.  You need a mind that it focused on your purpose, focused on your well being, and focused on loving YOU.

You need a strong spiritual life.  Not the kind where the only time you think about or talk to God is when you're posting something online.  Not the kind where you go to church because it's another place to gather socially. You need a strong desire to be healthy.  Not because it's popular, but, because you want to live your BEST life.  A strong desire to not put toxins in your mouth, your mind, your eyes, your body, and your ears.

Have you checked for kinks in your armor of God?  You know this is a battle. 
The enemy has been attacking you since you got here - and if you're not checking your armor, the enemy will slide right through.  Can you cut a tomato with a dull knife?  NO.  Why then, would you think that if you're not maintaining your armor that you would be safe?

Babe, every time you fall to your knees and pray, you're building your armor.
Babe, every time you speak the truth in the midst of lies, you're building your armor.
Babe, every time you fill your mind with positive thoughts, you're building your armor.
Babe, every time you refuse to gossip with "them", you're building your armor.

Don't stop now.